One of your first big wedding decisions is also one of the most defining: how many people will witness your vows? The size of your celebration shapes everything else—the venue, the budget, the vibe, and ultimately, the memories you’ll create. There isn’t a universal “right” size, but there is a right size for you.
The Magic of Intimate Gatherings
Let’s talk intimate first—we’re talking roughly 20-75 guests. These weddings feel less like events and more like gatherings of your innermost circle. You’ll actually have meaningful conversations with every guest. Your photographer can capture genuine moments instead of rushing through formal groupings of distant relatives. Dinner feels like a dinner party where you know everyone’s name, their stories and why they matter to you. The downside? Someone you care about probably won’t make the cut and that’s difficult.
Grand celebrations—think 150-300+ guests—bring different magic. There’s an undeniable energy when you walk into a room full of everyone who’s been part of your journey. These weddings feel like true events with that electric atmosphere that only comes from big gatherings. You can include extended family, work friends, college roommates and childhood neighbors. The tradeoff is intimacy. You’ll spend your reception moving from table to table, making brief appearances and you might barely remember eating your own dinner. Connections feel shallower because there’s simply not enough time.
Questions to Help You Decide
Consider your relationship style. Are you homebodies who treasure small dinner parties with close friends? Or do you thrive in large social settings where you can work the room? Do you have a tight-knit group of ten essential people, or sprawling social networks across multiple life chapters?
Budget matters too, obviously. Smaller weddings allow you to splurge on quality like better food, premium alcohol, luxurious accommodations, stunning locations. Larger weddings require budget-consciousness across categories to make the math work, but they can still be spectacular.
What Kind of Memories?
Think about what you’ll remember. Do you want the memory of your best friend’s toast reaching everyone in an intimate room or the sight of hundreds of people dancing to celebrate you? Both are beautiful, they’re just different kinds of beautiful. Choose the size that matches your personalities, honors the relationships that matter most and creates the kind of memory you want to revisit for the rest of your lives.
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